Wednesday, April 11, 2007


The political career of Belinda Stronach has died. It was nearly four years old.

In its short but tumultous life, her political career made a number of enormously large contributions to absolutely nothing. Sometimes lacking in judgement, morals, loyalty, integrity and intellect, but always attracting the attention of the world's media (the CBC, surely? - Ed), Belinda's career inspired dogs everywhere to consider entering the political realm. Among the corgi population of Eastern Ontario, she will be sadly missed.

Weighed down by massive amounts of ambition, and an equally large wallet, some had long predicted that the political career could not survive, and indeed, it had appeared to be suffering from stagnation in recent months. Still, the suddeness with which it entered its terminal decline caught some by surprise. It seems the final crisis was so rapid in its progression that even elite Liberal spin-doctors were unable to resuscitate the career.

Belinda's political career is survived by Stephen Harper, some bad dog jokes, a very messy divorce proceeding and the remains of Chrysler.

Earth to earth, dust to dust, Magna to Magna.

Although unconfirmed, it is believed that Belinda's career has left a number of boxes of Complex Files to Mr. Mark Holland.