As an extra measure to ensure the safety of the 'green' experts, police will be issued with a handy cut-out-and-keep guide to wildlife identification. One expert, speaking on condition of anonymity, told TDPC "We have a lot of problems with moose at this time of year. They get close to the city, and become convinced they can make it to the House of Commons. They're very dangerous when their hormones are up with that lust for power."
The new guide is reproduced below:
