A Year Is A Long Time in Doggerel Politics

Well, it's been nearly a year of inactivity here on the blog, but what a year it's been in real life. Without going into too many gory personal details, 2011 has been a year of upheaval, transformation, regrouping and new beginnings for everyone in the Doggerel Party. It was not my own finest hour, to put it mildly.

Doggerelle is no longer a member of the party; the division was traumatic but is now very amicable. The next generation of Doggerels continues to spend time in both camps and I think it's all now being handled as well as it ever can.

The really sad news is that the corgis are gone - neither of us is living in dog friendly accommodation and so Sam, Lucy and Amie had to find new homes last December. I don't know where they went exactly, but it was handled by their original breeders each of whom I would trust with my own life, so I know they will be happy and thriving wherever they are.

The year has changed me and it has changed some of my views on some issues - notably the justice system. In other areas I remain, as it says on my Twitter profile, a touch to the right of Attila the Hun. I haven't abandoned the blogosphere and now I'm planning to be posting again from time to time when I have something useful to say.

Can we be the Doggerel Party without corgis? It's hard to know. I think the dogs would want us to keep going, and I do plan on there being more corgis in my future, so for now we'll keep the name and the URL and see how it goes.

It Was Thirty Years Ago Today

...or something. All over the world, journalists, pundits, spin doctors and pseuds of all stripes are taking out an onion, wringing hands and competing for the most pretentious, most 'me me me' piece on the death of some potheaded peacenik doggerel poet. Is it any wonder we're in the mess we're in with the boomer generation in their last gasp of power?

Brute Force

If you're reading this post, you can't fail to be well informed about the recent complaints levelled at Ottawa police, after videos have been released that show officers assaulting people in custody. There is some hand-wringing going on in the city, and a number of "just a couple of bad apple" letters have appeared in the Citizen.

As a resident of the area, I'm just going to chime in with my own observations. As anyone reading the rest of this blog could deduce, I'm a pretty conservative, traditional, law 'n' order kind of guy. I was brought up to respect the law and especially to respect the police. Since we came to Canada in 1996, I've had a few encounters with police - some OPP, some Ottawa police. Full disclosure: some of those encounters involved traffic tickets, all but one of which were deserved. Some were reporting crimes, like my car having been broken into. Some were calling for help on behalf of someone else. Some were just in passing, or watching officers deal with someone else.

While dealing with OPP officers, I've had some very good experiences - they've always been polite, and for the most part intelligent and helpful. I wish I could say the same for the Ottawa Police Service. But without exception, I have found Ottawa Police officers to be rude, unhelpful, laissez-faire, and often on the wrong side of the situation. Indeed, I was threatened myself with arrest once, after complaining about nearly being hit by a left turning motorist while crossing a street with the light in my favour.

Policing in Canada seems to attract a certain kind of male - often suffering from Short Man Syndrome, these are men who probably would never achieve authority in any other walk of life. So I don't think it's a few bad apples who need removing from the barrel; I think it's time to take a much longer, harder look at what's going into the barrel in the first place. This should be job number one for Ottawa's new council.

AJC Has High Praise for PMSH

The American Jewish Committee has singled out Canada's Prime Minister Stephen Harper as a world leader of great moral clarity in their weekly radio commentary.

Transcript and audio can be found here. Because you won't find it in Canada's media.

h/t reader & friend Mike.

Canada's War in Afghanistan : An Apology

Over the last few years, we may have given readers the idea that Canada's presence in Afghanistan was illegitimate, ill-advised, an example of the warmongering policies of GW Steven Busharper and generally a Very Bad Thing. Headlines such as "Bring Them Home" and "End Harper's War Now" may have mistakenly conveyed this impression.

We now recognize that Canada is engaged in important work, that the Afghan mission is not complete and that to desert the Afghans in 2011 would just be another cowardly Tory government decision made for political expediency.

We apologize for any confusion.

(c) All Canadian Media Outlets 2010.

Doggerel Party Exclusive: Top Secret Drone Revealed

We know it's been very quiet around TDPC headquarters of late - life has been chaotic and the corgis have retreated to their crates and been sulking over various things. However, all that crate time appears to have paid off. We're back and with a red-hot exclusive story too; it turns out that Sam and his engineering team have been working on a top secret project for the Liberals. As far as we can tell, Iggy, strongly opposed to Canada's purchase of F-35 fighter jets and certain that he will soon become PM, has contracted with the Schnauzer-works division of Doggerel Labs to develop an alternative.

The new, unmanned drone will form the backbone of Liberal defense policy and will initially be deployed to defend Canada's Arctic against incursions by (to take a random example) Russian bombers.

Our reporters, armed with kibble and stuffy toys, have been able to extract from the corgis the key elements of the design of this new drone and also a spy photograph showing the weapon.

Wildlife Problems In Ottawa

Ottawa police have recently come under fire (no pun intended) for shooting some stray moose in Ottawa neighborhoods. In response the city is hiring wildlife experts to help deal with problem animals.

As an extra measure to ensure the safety of the 'green' experts, police will be issued with a handy cut-out-and-keep guide to wildlife identification. One expert, speaking on condition of anonymity, told TDPC "We have a lot of problems with moose at this time of year. They get close to the city, and become convinced they can make it to the House of Commons. They're very dangerous when their hormones are up with that lust for power."

The new guide is reproduced below:

The Inspiration Behind UK Pope Memo

EXCLUSIVE: TDPC has learned that the UK Foreign Office staffer who composed the mocking memo that has called into question the state visit of Benedict XVI was inspired by an equally intelligent, sophisticated and universally admired former political staffer from Canada. The identity of the Canadian whose methods are so admired has not been revealed. However, it is believed the FO staffer had recently read a book by the name of "Kicking Ass in Canadian Politics."

Now Is The Time At TDPC

when the corgis try their paws at this juxtaposing thing:

Liberal pollster Frank Graves:

the Liberal Party ... should invoke a “culture war” to battle the Conservatives. He described this as a battle between “cosmopolitanism versus parochialism, secularism versus moralism, Obama versus Palin, tolerance versus racism and homophobia, democracy versus autocracy. If the cranky old men in Alberta don’t like it, too bad. Go south and vote for Palin.”

Liberal Party website:

Professional Victim Number 6,724 at the HRTO

Well, OK, we're not sure of the exact number. But allow the corgis to introduce you to Richard Grainer. Mr. Grainer is the subject of a feature article in today's Ottawa Citizen. It describes his long running battle with his landlord and his neighbors over fumes from a clothes dryer that he alleges have triggered 22 asthma attacks in his three year old son.

Now, asthma is a serious business, as Doggerelle well knows. And if, let's say, the landlord had been uncooperative and unconcerned, perhaps there might be grounds for Mr. Grainer to feel aggrieved. But the Citizen makes clear that the landlord has bent over backwards to accommodate Mr. Grainer and his son. They have moved the dryer vent to several different locations. They have attempted to locate and seal points in Mr. Grainer's apartment where the fumes might enter. Neighbors have experimented with not using softener sheets. And in the end Mr. Grainer is not satisfied, so off to the Human Rights Tribunal he goes.

Coincidentally, I am also the parent of a three year old boy. And also by coincidence, I have recently had first hand the experience of watching him stop breathing, albeit for only about 30 seconds. But I can tell you, that if I knew something in the environment where I was living meant that I would have to live those 30 seconds again, along with the 911 call, the ambulance ride, the anxious time in the ER... I would be out of there with my family before you could say "Barbara Hall." Even if I felt that my landlord hadn't taken care of things, care for the child trumps all principle, all stubbornness, all pride.

Not so for Mr. Grainer. This is a man who has already harassed one neighbor out of the triplex over a dog. Now he's on the Great Dryer Vent-etta, aided and abetted by all the usual Human Rights Industry suspects. Mr. Grainer won't move his son out of danger because, he says, he "likes living" where he is.

If only there were a Commission looking out for this little boy's right to responsible parental care.