Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Job Posting

The Liberal Party of Canada has an opening for a Poster Boy. This high profile position will deflect attention away from important issues of policy, and provide cover for corruption within the Liberal Party. The successful candidate will have the following qualifications:

Mandatory:
  • Baby face
  • Aged between 15 and 15, in perpetuity
  • Contacts within the Human Rights Industry
  • Excellent media relations, including a fawning and cringing relationship with CBC reporters
  • Fluent in Arabic
  • Experience as an international terrorist
  • Family tradition of terrorist activity
Desired:
  • Confirmed kills of American service personnel are a significant advantage
  • Brown envelopes of cash would be an asset, to the Liberal Party, that is
  • Significant periods of incarceration will be considered highly desirable
To apply, please send resume, charges and documentation confirming terrorist affiliation to:

M. Ignatieff, Liberal Party of Canada
81 Metcalfe Street, Suite 400
Ottawa, Ontario
K1P 6M8
Phone : (613) 237-0740
Fax : (613) 235-7208