New! From Doggerel Party Toys: The Folk Hero Series

Doggerel Party Toys (Shanghai) Inc. is proud to announce a new, exclusive line of action figures: The Canadian Folk Hero series. This new series of figures are carefully selected by Canadian icon Karren Winsella and lovingly rendered in Saudi sourced petrochemicals. The series begins with three characters, all of whom are indisputably Folk Heroes of Canada.

1. Warren Kinsella

Warren needs no introduction. The action figure comes with stuffed dinosaur accessory, a can of cat carefully labeled in Mandarin, and a free portrait of Marjory LeBreton knitting. Action features include a working libel suit launcher, a real swelling ego and an oversized wallet with real bragging motion.

2. Richard Warman

The Richard Warman figure comes complete with a free bonus stack of grievances and a pack of hurt feeling cards so you can play Human Rights Bingo. Download the free iPhone or Android app and you can assume up to five fictitious online identities. The app includes a special Richard! button, that will stop anyone in your household from saying anything.

3. Theresa Spence

The Chief Spence doll comes with a 12 pack of canned fish broth and a Cadillac Escalade. Action features on this figure include the "call police" feature. When activated, this will release the Attawapiskat police detachment who will then evict anyone heard asking you a question. The hunger strike action allows Chief Theresa to consume the fish broth¹. Chief Theresa talks too, with a selection of famous phrases: "My hands are tied." "There's no trust." "It's the government's fault."

¹ Weight loss simulated.

Watch toy stores and the left wing blogosphere for your chance to own this exclusive collection!!

Lookalike: The Two Faces of Warren Kinsella

Sharp eyed as ever, the corgis couldn't help but notice the strong resemblance between the two faces of Warren Kinsella: The one that wrote "As both a Catholic and an Ontario Liberal" when addressing an issue of interest to a Catholic audience, and the one who wrote "Look at me, folks. I am a latté-sipping, Kyoto-loving, One-World Government Secular Humanist." when addressing issues of interest to a Jewish audience. Could these faces be related?

Small boy under political fire

A small child today came under intense attack from candidates in the Calgary Centre by-election, after he claimed that the Most High Emperor Obama was not, in fact, clothed in threads of scarlet and finest gold but was rather not wearing any clothes at all.

Ontario to get a woman premier?

So Kathleen Wynne has thrown her hat into the ring to replace Dalton McShifty as chief architect of Ontario's economic ruin. Could she be Ontario's first female premier?

The corgis don't think so. In the words of Austin Powers... that's not a woman, it's a man, man.

Farewell, Dalton

Couldn't let the moment pass without chiming in, although most that can be said has already been said. From the Liberal side of the fence, we're hearing what a great man he was, and how Ontario is a better place after nine years of McGuinty-ism. And if you come from that perspective, why wouldn't you say this? He's been an absolute poster child for the nanny state. He garnered many many Liberal votes, and if you are a Liberal, then that's what matters. The price of those votes doesn't matter, because it's just taxpayer's money - not their own. They'll never have to pay.

And in the end, this is the McGuinty legacy in a nutshell. He's not changed too much on a practical day to day level, except to turn Ontario from a manufacturing province to a welfare one. But he has changed the culture of the province. Ontarians now expect their government to tell them what to do and what to think - and their government to pay for it as well - to a far greater extent than we did ten years ago. He's proved that promises count for nothing - first on taxes, then on Caledonia, and most recently by even turning his back on the Big Labour that brung him.

The tide of socialism has washed large over the province and it will take a very long time and a lot of hard work to reverse it.

Tim Hudak is emphatically not the man for that job. The Ontario PCs should take the chance they've now been offered to get a new leader, a new team, some new discipline, new policy and new message. There's a chance for the amateur hour to end now, and they should take it.

The Completely Not New Kinsella Duality

WK has a post up equating what he calls "anti-Muslim" writing - in other words, any objective discussion of concerns about radical Islam - with the topless photos of Kate Middleton recently published in France.

This is ironic, coming from a man who flew into an apoplectic rage because someone called his girlfriend a "squeeze." Somehow I doubt he would be so free-speechy if someone published nude photos of La La, despite his implication that this would be fair game.

After 17 Years, I Finally Figured Out Canadian Policing

This article about why British police remain unarmed contains a simple statement that suddenly explained for me the jarring difference between police officers in my old country and police officers in my new one.

"Arming the force would, say opponents, undermine the principle of policing by consent - the notion that the force owes its primary duty to the public, rather than to the state, as in other countries."

That completely different philosophical understanding explains everything. It's why we see so many cases of police beating people up, why police in Canada are so often rude, ignorant and thuggish. I couldn't understand it when I got here, but this is it.

Lookalike: DNC Edition

This poster turned the tide on socialism in Britain in 1979:

So its interesting to see Republicans handing out these at the heart of American socialism, the DNC.

Lookalike

Sharp eyed corgis will have noticed the uncanny resemblance between the pot-banging, mentally challenged character Ruprecht, played by a con artist who is in turn played by Steve Martin in the film Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, and the pot-banging leader of the Parti Quebecois, Pauline Marois.

We Get Spam

To: corgis .at. Doggerelparty.ca
From: Richard Warman
Subject: Urgent Confidential Business Proposition

Sir,

Am Richard Warman, Barrister at law and currently representing estate of recently deceased Mr. Section Thirteen former dictator of Ottawa, Canada.

I am trusting you with this most confidential matter of utmost urgency knowing you are of good character Bd morals and will benefit magnificently from proposal I am put to you.

During his lifetime I was Mr. Thirteen's closest friend and advocate and he rewarded me handsomely for this. Between us we accumulate large sums of money and vast holdings of hurt feelings. Am also in possession of quantities of offence and large tract of political correctness.

Now Mr. Thirteen has passed away, peace and glory be upon him, and I need your help to transfer the funds and grievances to a more friendly country. As you may know Canada is country in state of civil war with mobs ruling large parts of cities and racial massacres occurring every evening at half past five. Am urgently in need therefore of your help to transfer Mr. Thirteen's great and noble portfolio of human rights to a better and freer country.

If you are willing to help me move Mr. Thirteen's forty year of accumulation to a friendly regime such as Syria or Zimbabwe I look forward to your confidential response.

Am sincerely yours trusting in spirit of atheism and also Allah you will assist me in most worthwhile scheme.

Richard Warman
Barrister and Attorney, Ottawa Canada